No Sex Please - We Are Young Japanese Men

If you are a young man, middle-aged man, old man, single, married or both - and not Japanese, you might want to take a trip to Japan soon.

While Japan is known for its fetishes, porn, liberal views on sex - despite the western image of Japan as being a bunch of straight, suit-wearing men with black-framed glasses and no sense of humor - there is, according to a recent study a disturbing trend going on n the country. Well, perhaps it's more disturbing for the heterosexual Japanese women.

Studies (plural) seem to dictate that young Japanese men don't really want to date or have sex.

Have the youth of today had their ego destroyed by one gaijin's sexual romps through their country 20 years ago? Uh... that would be me.

Is it because they have grown up without a father? Could I be their father?

No. Nothing could be father, I mean farther from the truth, though I suppose it could be possible I have about 20 kids somewhere, in which case I think I need a legal battle with the Trojan folks. 

Excuse me... but I have to sit down. Young Japanese men aren't interested in dating or sex?! What is wrong with you Japan? Did I teach you nothing in three years?! You can have your cake and eat it too... and then screw the cake.   

The survey was conducted in June 2010 by the National Institute of Population and Social Security Research, a research group related to the Health, Labor and Welfare Ministry, was based on answers from roughly 7,000 single men and women, mostly aged 18 to 34. The Tokyo-based think tank conducts the survey every five years.

The survey found that 61 per cent of unmarried adult men surveyed said they do not have girlfriends.


As well, the proportion of unattached men jumped 9.2 percentage points since the last survey in 2005, with 45 per cent of the no-girlfriend guys said they are not particularly interested in finding one.

So... what's the story? Why don't young Japanese men want to date women and screw their brains out?  

Some have said they just want to hang around and play video games.

Okay... I've played a lot of video games. I started with Space Invaders et al, knew how to do the old quarter on a string trick for free credits, had: a Pong; an Odyssey, Atari 400 and Atari 1200XE computer, Sega, Sega Genesis, Sega Game Gear, Nintendo Famicon and Nintendo Super Famicon, Nintendo 64, Ninetendo Gameboy, Nintendo Gameboy Advance, Sony PS2, Sony PS3... and there's probably a few others I've left out accidentally. I've even played video games on the computer - text games like Zork and HitchHikers Guide To The Galaxy, Leisure Suit Larry In the Land of the Lounge Lizards, - the whole Ultima series... some on a floppy disk... they real floppy ones!    

But let me tell you... back then... if there was a chance I was going to get laid I would have said sayonara to the video games.

Hell, even now... I have a PS3... I'd rather get laid by some little red-haired devil-woman than play Halo. Get my rocks off rather than play Guitar Hero. Your gaming skills don't impress me as much as your ass.  Is that not the way to think?

It doesn't matter if you think you are good at video games (the first time I solved the computer puzzle game Myst, I did it in seven hours - whoo-hoo! Where's my prize? I'd rather see a woo-hoo!) - we're talking about sex! Young Japanese men! Stop playing with your joystick and let a woman hit your reset button + triangle + circle +L2. You know what I mean.

The study complains that Japan's population could go down by some 30 per cent over the next 10-30 years. That's because there is less going down. Less dating = less sex = less babies.

Of course... this whole study implies that dating + sex = babies. Really? This is Japan, after all. Dating + sex + marriage + sex = babies.

Are married Japanese men coming home from a hard day of working for a salary and then plopping down in front of the TV to play Sonic the Hedgehog? Really? Who the hell was asked in these surveys?

Now... there may be something to the survey if it is indeed true that young Japanese men don't even want to date a woman because they are apathetic about dating and sex.  

One college student says, "It's not that guys don't like women. But it's just easier and more fun to hang out with other guys."

True. But I suppose it depends on how you define easy and fun. An easy woman is indeed fun - not that I would know anything about that, of course.

Another says, "If you want a date, you have to ask the guy out yourself."

I suppose we should all assume that the second speaker (Another says) is a man talking about what women should do. If not, and it's about a man talking about men, then we have another solution as to why men don't want to date women.

I would take this study with a grain of saltpeter (saltpeter was used to make sure you didn't get a hard-on). Sometimes a survey sampled can have results skewed one way, which isn't really representative of the majority of people.

The survey was conducted in June 2010 by the National Institute of Population and Social Security Research, a research group related to the Health, Labor and Welfare Ministry, was based on answers from roughly 7,000 single men and women, mostly aged 18 to 34. The Tokyo-based think tank conducts the survey every five years.

June 2010? That was before my life turned upside down. That was before Japan was devastated by the big Tohoku earthquake, tsunami and subsequent nuclear problems. That was before loss of income, jobs, abandon hope all ye who enter here.

Cripes! Things could actually be worse now in 2012!


The most recent 2010 survey found that 61 per cent of unmarried adult men surveyed said they do not have girlfriends.

As well, the proportion of unattached men jumped 9.2 percentage points since the last survey in 2005, with 45 per cent of the no-girlfriend guys said they are not particularly interested in finding one.

Let's schtupp! Now!

Now... 7,000 single men AND women is a fair-sized poll (sp)... not that Japanese women would know about that, so at least the pollsters tried... but how many were men? And how many men are there in Japan within that range?

It is possible (though unlikely, to be fair), that pollsters just got lucky (or unlucky as the case seems to be) in questioning all of the men in Japan that don't want sex.  

I think if you asked those men to look at the photo of the sexy Japanese woman just above, I think they would want to 'date' her two or three times a night.

Buried in the survey results, both single men and women are now actually more picky, and will wait longer to find the right partner.

While that is great, I suppose, but it still doesn't explain the high number of respondents who say they don't want to date or get laid. Does that imply that more people are interested in saving themselves for marriage? Oh... won't that be a disappointment when you realize your new husband or wife does not share you same sexual wants or desires! On the plus side, you won't have a reference point  for what lousy or great sex is like.   

Almost half of women surveyed are unmarried and unattached – and similarly to the men, about 45 per cent are content with staying that way for now. Still, also mirroring the men, the biggest surge in women without a partner is logged among those 20 to 24 years old.
This whole 20-24 year old single thing is good. Get married when you are ready, not because you must by a certain age.

My own parents were married (by their own choice) at the age of 24. I felt like a loser when 24 came and went and I wasn't married, couldn't find a girlfriend, and had never even been laid! Not for lack of trying either. Maybe that was because I was chasing the blonde super model with big tits. Whatever... I had not yet matured by that age. It doesn't matter what color the hair is - you can always get some hair color. What matters is that they are super models with big tits.

Maybe the Japanese are feeling that way, as well?  That they will get married when they are ready - not when their parents or society dictates they should get married.

Japan is not a Carrousel tour of Logan's Run. Time does not run out when you hit 30!

Too much masturbation can create nasty sores that will kill you.

I'm not concerned about that.

I am concerned about them not even wanting to have sex, and even more so about not wanting to date! How the hell are you going to have fun and experience proper social interaction if you never even date? How can you have any pudding if you won't eat your meat?

Of those surveyed, the average age that they want to get married by is 30.4-years-old for men and 28.4 for women.

Some number crunching for you: men and women aged 18 to 24 like being single because they feel they are too young to get married. Well, d'uh. You probably are.

As for WHY men and women of all ages (except the 18-24 group), the reason chosen increased for every group, stating that it was not easy to find that perfect match.

No effin' kidding.

By Andrew Joseph

Feelin' Alright

Sun breaking through the clouds - by Andrew Joseph

It's Saturday, December 7, 1991, and just yesterday evening, I broke up with my girlfriend! Yay me!

No, wait a minute... I think I actually just broke up with my ex-girlfriend.

My ex-girlfriend who was a friend-with-benefits.

Why the hell would I do that? That sounds really stupid when you think about it... breaking up with a woman you aren't dating but get to sleep with on occasion... oh my god... I think I'm going to be sick.

Today is the 50th anniversary of Pear Harbour Day. 'nuff said. I've had enough sneak attacks and torpedoing in the past 16 months of my stay here in Ohtawara-shi, Tochigi-ken, Japan.

It's time to relax and enjoy doing stuff for me.

To begin, I try to phone a few friends to apologize for my past crappy behavior... but either they aren't home, or no one is answering: back in Toronto, it's Rob Jones and John Kutchera, here in Tochigi it's James Dalton and Amanda Goodsell. I've just been curt with them through no fault of their own. It was just me. Stupid old, immature me.

I also try to call Matthew - not to apologize for anything in particular, but just to talk about me breaking up with Ashley. Ashley is probably pretty confused right now... wondering how the hell one can break up with someone they aren't going out with - but, dammit, I have found a way!

Oh well... to celebrate my new found independence, I go out and get my hair cut over at Nakamura's. I give Mr. Nakamura a Canadian keychain (it had the flag and the word 'CANADA" on it) simply as a gift because I feel like it, but unfortunately, you can't just give someone in Japan a present without it being reciprocated in some fashion.

Dude... just give me a free haircut.

But no. Via Muneo - my actual hair stylist - he says that we will all drive up to Nasu-yama (Mount Nasu, maybe 20 kilometers north of Ohtawara) in January for a photo opportunity. He mentions Matthew will join us, but I am unsure if that means Matthew has already been asked, or if I am the afterthought. Whatever! It's all good! I'm not getting laid anymore so... hey!

Mt. Nasu is the tallest mountain in the middle right.

I go home and grab my camera and walk out the door to start taking some photos around Ohtawara.

Usually I snap vistas from my balcony or the roof of my seventh floor apartment building... but this time... this time I went out at street level. 

Simple stuff... everyday stuff... everyday perhaps in Ohtawara, but to me, it all seems fresh, exciting and new! Why have I not done this before? I always had something else to do, but that's a stupid excuse.

Heck, I 'discovered' a temple right next to a nearby 7-11. How the heck did I not see this place before? I guess I only had eyes for Slurpee.

At a small local shop, I purchase a black lacquered floral tea set and some lacquered miso soup bowls. Not that I will ever use it, but merely because they look 'Japanese' and I appreciate the craftsmanship that went into its creation.

Back home, I spend the rest of the day and night re-arranging my apartment - something I haven't done since I first moved into the place.

It's nothing spectacular, but once again, 307 Zuiko Haitsu is MY home.

Hey! Where the hell is Junko?! Oh well... perhaps she already knows I need to be alone. But truthfully, I just want to be alone in Japan with the Japanese. It's why I came here, isn't it?

Somewhere feeling myself,
Andrew Joseph
PS: I will post some photos of Ohtawara-shi tomorrow! I want to show you my hometown!  
Today's blog title is by Traffic (and perhaps a better version by Joe Cocker):

Menstruation and why women can't...

That title is something, isn't it?

Menstruation and why women can't be... what?

Here's two things women are forbidden to do in Japan: be sumo wrestlers, and sushi chefs.

That whole bleeding thing that women do every few weeks disrupts the Japanese traditional views on purity.

Hunh. Who knew?

I used to watch Iron Chef (Japanese version) and go to sushi restaurants, and always used to wonder why I never saw any female Japanese sushi chefs... who knew it was because they menstruate? I thought it was just some old boy's club that sort of prevented women from the profession. Like being a professional engineer here in Canada and the U.S.... old boy's club from about 30 years ago. Or being a doctor 100 years ago... nursing was fine... but a doctor? Better leave that to the men, dear...  Or being in the armed forces... I'll save you, lady!

Who knew that Japan was sexist?

Of course Japan is sexist. It was when I lived there in the early 90s, and while I am sure there has been some progress since I left, I was always sure that chauvinism was still going to exist in Japan for many a year long after I left.

But blaming it on menstruation? Men-struation... wow. At least there's a proper dignified reason that I am now aware of. That's sarcasm, by the way. It's so difficult to write sarcasm and ensure that everyone reading knows you are being sarcastic...  

Here's a comment from the son of Ono Jiro, a sushi master who owns a three-star Michelin restaurant in Tokyo's Ginza district. His menu starts at Cdn/US $300 and only gets higher. The son's name is Ono Yoshikazu.

So... Mr. Ono-san... why aren't there any female sushi craftsmen (aka shokunin)? 

Says Ono-san: "The reason is because women menstruate. To be a professional means to have a steady taste in your food, but because of the menstrual cycle women have an imbalance in their taste, and that’s why women can’t be sushi chefs."

And this is coming from the son one of the world's best sushi masters, an 86-year-old who also happens to be the subject of “Jiro Dreams of Sushi,” a documentary by American director David Gelb that recently premiered at the Berlinale this week. This son, is the man who will take up the mantle of one of the world's greatest sushi restaurant's, whose family name carries great weight in the world of sushi. 

Ono adds: "I have no children and am also not married. In Japan, work is regarded as the first thing…It might be different somewhere outside Japan where family comes first, but in Japanese tradition work comes first …There’s nothing you can do about it if you can’t see your family because you’re working and you have to trust that when the children grow up they do understand why their father was away. Because my father was trying so hard and working so hard…that’s why our restaurant exists."


Gods... work over family. I'm sure his father must have agreed... let me come home, knock up the wife, get a son, my job at home is done, now I can spend all of my time at my restaurant honing my craft. Sarcasm....

Personally, Japan - It's A Wonderful Rife believes that the menstruation reason is merely a handy excuse for remaining chauvinistic... Because Japan likes to pattern itself on being proper and dignified and following traditional values from the ancient past - back when life was so much better, it makes sense that these institutions remain the bastions of a society looking to remain a world power.

Japan... get your head out of your ass... women are fully capable of being sushi chefs... and doing it with style, verve and aplomb... as well as if not better than any male chef. While they will get their ass handed to them by their male sumo counterparts, there should be nothing to bar them from competing in the sport... but there is... as sumo wrestlers purify the clay ring with salt before battling... but a woman who could bleed from her vagina at any moment... well... it must truly frighten these men who will have no idea how to clean the ring afterwards.

Every time I think Japan is hot stuff, I am reminded that it still has a ways to go... to grow up.

Andrew Joseph

Homosexuality in Japan

 Hi there... Since my wife has a gay cousin living in Japan - apparently never mentioned by his parents and no one knowing where exactly he is or what he is doing, I thought maybe I would examined the subject of homosexuality in Japan.

I recall 20 years ago, that the Japanese were quite homophobic. I will assume there has been some change in that attitude, but realistically assume that it still has a long way to go. 

I'm not going to poke a finger at Japan for its views. People change as the environment changes. They adapt or they die out. Japan does adapt, and with regards to its views on such matters as homosexuality (yes, Virginia-san, there is a faggot), it will do so at its own speed.

Having said that, here's a piece I found on the Internet.

 The Gay Debate: Japan’s Comfy Closet, Part One

12/29/2010

By Catherine Makino

The Tokyo Gay Pride Parade in August of 2010.

TOKYO (majirox news) – There aren’t many Japanese people in the public eye who have announced they are gay. However, recently a small number of mainly male artists have started to speak out about being gay. They are on talk shows and other programs.
There are also some critics who complain that entertainers use gay stereotypes to increase their popularity.
According to Aya Kamikawa, a transgender assemblywoman in the Setagaya District of Tokyo, gender identity is highly progressive in Japan and the government implemented laws to protect them.
While Japan, she says, is ahead of most countries including Europe about gender identity, it is behind other Western countries about gay rights.
Five people with different backgrounds discussed with Majirox News how they viewed the gay situation in Japan. While they agreed that most people were not actively hostile to gays, they disagreed about the levels and forms of discrimination against them in society and the workplace.
Catherine Makino talked to them recently in Tokyo and published a two-part series of articles. The first one deals with the Japanese media.
Q: There are many popular entertainers on daily Japanese TV who are gay, transvestite, transgender, or nurture such a public persona, including transvestite Matsuko Deluxe and a transgender singer and personality named Haruna Ai.

How do you think these types of entertainers influence the public’s opinion of gays?

Hideki Sunagawa, a 40-year-old cultural anthropologist and president of Tokyo Gay Pride: It’s true that gay men are portrayed mainly as transgendered people. Even if they are not dressed like women, those who are on TV are very feminine in their behavior and in the way they talk.
Many Japanese people think that gay men are basically the same as transgender people and transvestites. They are extreme and there’s always one who plays a female role in gay couples.
Mariya Goya, a 22-year-old hairdresser in Tokyo: That’s exactly the point. TV portrays gays as overtly feminine, which creates these stereotypes that all gay men have this persona.
Miki Hamano: a middle-aged executive: Sunagawa-san makes a good point here. This is quite true. If Japanese TV is anything to judge by, he is 100% correct.
I involuntarily watch a lot of TV because my wife is addicted. I often glance up from whatever I’m reading and sometimes she’ll say that one of the women is a cross-dressing man. You’ll often see women dressing as men on TV and using male mannerisms. It’s not as frequent as men dressing as women, but it’s frequent enough.
Straight performers on Japanese TV seem to spend an enormous amount of time dressing as women, and some of the more outlandish comedians on TV dress as schoolgirls. Given that many of them are fat and ugly men nobody is going to mistake them for a woman or someone who is transgender.
Q: How about the Japanese entertainer Razor Ramon Hard Gay? In 2005, wearing a leather harness, hat and pants, he danced to the delight of his many Japanese fans. He built a career on using bizarre and extreme antics to parody gays.

Professor, a 30-year-old gay university professor who requested to remain anonymous: Most Japanese knew that Razor Ramon was not gay. We knew he was like most entertainers who wanted fame and to earn a lot of money.
Hamano: And people keep underestimating the sense of humor and the knack for parody that Japanese have. Cross-dressing seems to be nothing more than a cliché of Japanese comedy.
Everyone knows that competition in the performing world is so intense that you have to build a persona different from what any other performer has, and the weirder the better. You’re barking up the wrong tree here.
Q: According to a recent Yahoo News article O-ne-kei (sisterly types) are effeminate gays, transgender gays or drag queens on TV, and they are considered to be in the same group. They are popular because they say things women can relate to.

If they were really women, females would get jealous, but as long as it comes from a drag queen or a transgender person, it’s OK. Gays can get away with being spiteful and not being disliked, says the article.
Sunagawa: While some people realize that O-ne-kei people, who appear on TV, are different, this also enforces a stereotype
Charles Ayres, a media personality and openly gay 33-year-old American in Tokyo: In the United States they are called LGBT, which stands for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender, and people in each of these groups see themselves as separate entities.
And the Japanese public likes gays and transgendered performers as long as they don’t say anything political. I wish the ones in the spotlight would do a little more to focus on civil unions, HIV-infected people, drug abuse or any of the serious topics that affect the LGBT.
Hamano: No Japanese performers say a thing about this. Why should gay Japanese performers single themselves out to make an issue of it? I disagree strongly with his logic. It’s very American.
Ayres: It is their responsibility to bring up important issues to the attention of the public and it’s not an American thing. Japan doesn’t offer any legal recognition of same-sex relationships. There are civil unions in other countries, including South Africa, Brazil, Holland, France and Canada.
Q: Would you say that there is an increasingly realistic awareness about gays today in Japan, especially with the Internet and more information getting out?
Ayres: TV shows such as The L Word and Sex in the City, which were big hits in Japan, have helped in raising awareness in the media, even though some gays find the gay characters in these series overly stereotyped.
Sunagawa: As I mentioned earlier, there is confusion between gender identity and sexual orientation. Still, many people believe gay/lesbian people are immoral for choosing the same sex partners.

he Gay Debate: Comfy Closet, Part Two

01/04/2011

By Catherine Makino

The Tokyo Gay Parade in August of 2010

TOKYO (majirox news) – Catherine Makino continues part two of the discussion with people from different backgrounds about the gay situation in Japan. While there are no laws against homosexuality in Japan, there are few openly gay celebrities and politicians. There is little political support for gay rights.
Aya Kamikawa, a transgender assemblywoman in the Setagaya District of Tokyo, has heard from many gay people that they feel discriminated against in Japan.
And yet, she says, “It’s a non-issue here. A government survey on minority groups showed that fewer than one percent of Japanese were interested in gay issues.”
Q: Do you believe Ms. Kamikawa is correct in her perspective that gay rights are not an issue in Japan?
Hideki Sunagawa, 40, cultural anthropologist and president of Tokyo Gay Pride: Gay and lesbian matters are a non-issue because Japanese believe it’s a private matter.
The concept of human rights is different here than in Western countries. Gay people themselves don’t regard sexual orientation issues matters of human rights. If someone were to die or be killed as a result of discrimination, then it would be a human rights issue.
Q: Do you think it’s an issue?
Sunagawa: Some people, myself included, think it’s a social issue. I organized the Tokyo Pride Parade to move the issue more into the mainstream and show Japanese people that being gay is all right.
Miki Hamano, executive in Tokyo: But gay people are generally well integrated into society, and most people are uninterested in others’ sexual orientation. It has little or no impact on their relationships with others. In Japanese society, homosexuality is similar to being left-handed: It is not an issue.
Charles Ayres, 33, media personality and openly gay American in Tokyo: Hamano-san is wearing rose-colored glasses. It is a huge issue in Japan. Most people go to great lengths to hide their sexuality from their families and co-workers.
At an executive level — especially at older, more conservative companies — it is definitely an issue. Sorry, but openly gay men cannot easily join the “good ol’ boy’s club” that spends money at golf courses or hostess clubs in Ginza.
Professor, 30, a university professor who requested to remain anonymous: That’s true. My partner, who works in the travel business, got married because he wanted to climb the ladder and get promoted. He felt he had to protect himself. He had to cover up who he really was or they would block him at the higher levels.
Ayres: There’s also discrimination in housing. If you go to some real estate offices as a gay couple, they will subtly let you know ‘we don’t like your kind.’ That is why most gays move to hubs like Akabane or Nakano in Tokyo.
I’ve heard straight men in Tokyo who, not knowing that I understand Japanese, have talked about how they feel that gay men are disgusting. I’ve known American gay men who have committed marriage fraud (marrying Japanese female friends) to obtain a spousal visa and stay in Japan with their male Japanese partners.
Kenji Sasaki, 31, IT engineer: The bottom line is that there aren’t any merits in coming out to family or the workplace because of prejudice.
Q: Have you come out?
Sasaki: Like most gays, only to my good friends. I’m afraid to tell my father. He’s always asking me if I have a girlfriend and when I’m getting married. He would be so disappointed if he knew the truth.
Q: Is it different in Western countries?
Sasaki: Yes. There’s more solidarity and support groups, and they can vote for political candidates who support them. Of course, there’s also a powerful group that is against them. Japan is about 20 years behind the United States. We need confidence to be gay here.
In a 2008 online survey by Kyoto University of more than 5,500 homosexuals, more than 42 percent said they were depressed. More than 86 percent of those depressed were younger than 39 year old.
Coming Out

Sunagawa: I came out because I don’t like avoiding questions about my partners. I can’t keep pretending to be heterosexual.
I did it in graduate school during an interview test. One of my teachers always made gay jokes. It was painfully embarrassing, especially when the students laughed. However, students outside the classroom ignored the fact that I was gay.
Professor: That’s because Japanese people don’t want to touch this topic. They regard sexual orientation as private and it makes them uncomfortable. It’s polite to avoid talking about it.
Hamano: I’m skeptical about all this. Judging from what goes on with entertainment personalities (see Part One of this series), we are not uncomfortable with it and really don’t worry about the issue at all.
Japan does not share Western perspectives. In the United States, homosexuality and abortion are particular red-button issues, which is not the case in Japan.
Mariya Goya, 22, hairdresser in Tokyo: I disagree. There is a social taboo, and in reality, Western countries have more understanding of this than we have. In fact, my friends and I thought that gays were strange and that men who loved men were weird. My perception changed when I started working with gays and my best friend came out.
I wish the media would handle the subject more sensitively and show that gay people are normal.
Hamano: Why should people have to go out of their way to be sensitive to gay people when there is no visible discrimination or social contempt?

Q: If what Hamano-san says is correct, Professor and Mochizuki-san, why don’t you come out?
Professor: If I came out about half my colleagues would be shocked, and about half of them wouldn’t say anything but would still feel uncomfortable.
Q: Was it hard for you to admit you were gay to yourself as well?
Professor: I knew I was gay in kindergarten; I liked the pretty boys and felt more comfortable being around girls. I had crushes on male singers and actors. I lived in my own world. I didn’t want to talk to my father. I was bored listening to the other boys talk about girls and I eventually became scared to be with other people.
I wanted to reach out to gay men. I was curious about it, but the only ones I knew in school were really feminine and I didn’t want to contact them. It was lonely and I lived in the country side. I’m sure life would have been less complicated had I been born straight.
Sasaki: Today it’s not as lonely because there is a lot more information available to gays. You have the Internet, where you can find a girlfriend or boyfriend, talk to people and go to gay events.
Professor: That’s true. I wasn’t with anyone until I was in my mid 20s. I was in a park in Tokyo and this foreign man — I think he was American — came up to me and said, ‘I’m an English teacher, are you interested in me?’ After that, people said I changed and became more outgoing.
Sasaki: I gradually started realizing I was gay when I was 16 years old and felt isolated. It took a long time and the Internet wasn’t like it is now.
Q: Would you say there is less discrimination?
Sunagawa: There is rarely physical and verbal violence against gays, and many gay people enjoy gay bars and events. There are gay groups interested in music or sports in the urban cities of Japan, so they say they are not oppressed in their daily lives.
But we need to ask why most gay people can’t come out to their colleagues or family members.
Many gay people (especially gay men) say that they are not discriminated nor oppressed in their daily lives. However, oppression against gay people is so strong that many of them don’t even realize it. There aren’t any laws or social systems that protect or recognize gay couples, and that’s discrimination.
Q: Is it true that some gay people get around this by legally adopting their partner?
Ayres: Yes, but the lack of a sizeable movement to change this to a more official bond confirms that they have accepted their status as second-class citizens.
Sunagawa: For example, when a partner passes away, they can participate in the funeral only as a friend. Some say the deceased insist that gay friends not take part in the funeral, as parents and relatives may realize the departed person was gay.
Ayres: Let me also add that I have seen somewhat of an exodus of gay Japanese out of Japan — something of a ‘gay drain’ rather than a ‘brain drain’ — moving to Australia, Canada, France or anywhere the laws protect them to a greater measure. Unless the laws change, I think gays will continue to leave Japan.
Sunagawa: I believe that global solidarity will empower and help us solve the problems we are facing in our culture.


-30-

Tochigi Hotel Robbed of ¥1.5-Million

Three men walked into the Hotel Sun Route Tochigi in Tochigi-shi (Tochigi City), Tochigi-ken (Tochigi Prefecture), Japan on October 2, 2011 and robbed it of ¥1.5-million (~US/Cdn $20,100).

The men entered the hotel just before dawn and duct taped (gagged and bound) the lone employee on duty and then took the money.

The three robbers threatened the clerk with a knife and demanded the money from the cash register, and after taking the money fled the scene without hurting the clerk.

Still bound, the clerk used his nose to to press the buttons on the hotel's internal phone system to call another employee who was off on a break.

The clerk told police that two of the men were wearing black knit caps.

Editor's note: So everybody watch out for guys wearing these caps (sarcasm). It seems to have been a well-thought out plan, as these robbers must have cased the hotel to determined that: 1) there was a large amount of money stored at the hotel on a Sunday morning; 2) that one of the workers would be on break or; 3) it was an inside job and no casing was necessary as the guy tied up was in on it.
That was a lot of money, though. I'd say the hotel needs to make a bank deposit every day rather than once a week or so. Also... I'm impressed that the tied up clerk was able to accurately dial the phone number to alert his co-worker.

Andrew Joseph

Background On FIFA Club World Cup In Japan

As you may or may not know, Japan is the host for the 2011 FIFA Club World Cup.

You can read all about that HERE - but just be aware the qualifying teams for this tourney are still being sorted out, with a couple more teams to be announced in early November, and Japan's club entry not going to be known until December, when it crowns it's J-League champion. 

What you may not know is that the FIFA Club World Cup got its start in 2000 and was hosted by Brazil.

Japan then took over the hosting duties for four years in 2004 - 2008.

The United Arab Emirates then played host for two years in 2009 and 2010 until Japan was once named the host in 2011, and has already been named the host of the 2012 edition.

Unlike most international soccer matches, this one some political intrigue. 

Why? Well, according to FIFA... there's some history behind all of this.

First... the FIFA Club World Cup is a soccer tournament between the six champions of the seven continents. That means: Africa, Asia, Australia, Europe, North America, South America - but not Antarctica as there are no cities or permanent populations.

The very first FIFA Club World Cup was in 2000 in Brazil, and was officially known as the FIFA Club World Championship. The main problem with it was that it ran at the same time as UEFA's Intercontinental Cup tournament run since 1960 (featuring winners of the UEFA Champions League) and the Copa Libertadores tournament of South America.

The FIFA Club World Cup was a power struggle between FIFA and UEFA to control international soccer. Soccer hooliganism at an executive level.

The 2000 tourney had eight teams in it, and was won by Sport Club Corinthians Paulista over Club de Regatas Vasco da Gama (both Brazilian teams) that went to a penalty shoot-out (I hate deciding anything via penalty kicks!) after a 0-0 draw. Third place was also decided versus penalty shoot-out (fortunately after a 1-1 draw - someone please score!), as Mexico's Club Necaxa defeated Spain's Real Madrid Club de Fútbol.

In 2001 - the tournament lost a co-sponsor, ISL, and was cancelled. Too bad, as it was to have had 12 teams in Spain.

Taking a break in 2002, the tournament was going to be held in 2003... but, it too was red carded.

FIFA, perhaps a bit red-faced over all of this, looked to merge with UEFA, agreeing to do so in 2004... but agreed to wait until the UEFA Intercontinental Cup was completed in December... which mean there would not be a second FIFA Club World Cup until 2005.

Perhaps because FIFA's new sponsor was Toyota, the second ever Club World Cup was held in Japan - and it was officially known as the Club World Championship Toyota Cup - held December 11-18, 2005. It was actually shorter than it was in 2000, as a way of better aiding clubs involved in their regular country matches. This tournament also had fewer teams: the six actual continental champions, with CONMEBOL and UEFA champions getting a bye to the semi-finals.

It contained just the six reigning continental champions, with the CONMEBOL (Confederación Sudamericana de Fútbol - aka South America) and UEFA (Union of European Football Associations - aka Europe) champions receiving byes to the semi-finals of the tournament.

In 2005 (thru 2008), the matches were played at: Tokyo's National Stadium, Toyota Stadium in Toyota-shi in Aichi-ken and International Stadium in Yokohama-shi, Kanagawa-ken, which also played host to the finals. The cup was won by Brazilian squad São Paulo Futebol Clube 1-0 over Liverpool Football Club (UK), while Costa Rico's Deportivo Saprissa Sociedad Anónima Deportiva defeated Ittihad FC of Jeddah – نادي الاتحاد of Saudi Arabia 3-2 to claim third place.

In 2006 in Japan, the now named FIFA Club World Cup was won by Brazil's Sport Club Internacional 1-0 over  Futbol Club Barcelona of Spain with Egypt's Al-Ahly Sports Club defeating Mexico's Club de Fútbol América S.A. de C.V by a score of 2-1. It was also a 6-team tournament.

In 2007 in Japan, the club championship had seven teams (now featuring six continental champs plus the host nation) the was won by A.C. Milan of Italy 4-2 over Club Atlético Boca Juniors of Argentina, and third place was decided on a penalty shoot-out, after a 2-2 draw, won by host Japan's Urawa Red Diamonds over Étoile Sportive du Sahel from Tunisia.

In 2008 in Japan, the seven team  FIFA Club World Cup was won by the UK's Manchester United Football Club who defeated Liga Deportiva Universitaria de Quito of Equador, 1-0. Third place was won by Japan's Gamaba Osaka 1-0 over Pachuca Club de Fútbol of Mexico.

The 2009 seven-team tournament was held in Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates and featured seven teams including one from the host nation. Games were played at Al Jazira Mohammed Bin Zayed Stadium and Sheikh Zayed Stadium. Futbol Club Barcelona of Spain won the cup in extra time 2-1 over Argentina's Club Estudiantes de La Plata. Third place was won by Korea's Football Club Pohang Steelers포항 스틸러스 축구단 by a penalty shoot-out after a 1-1 score over Club de Fútbol Atlante from Mexico.

In 2010, the seven-team tourney was again held in the United Arab Emirates and was won by Italy's Football Club Internazionale Milano SpA 3-0 over Africa's team from the Congo, Tout Puissant Mazembe. The third place victors were Sport Club Internacional of Brazil who defeated Korea's Seongnam Ilhwa Chunma Football Club성남일화 천마축구단 by a score of 4-2.

Who will win the 2011 tournament once again held in Japan - though only at Toyota Stadium and International Stadium Yokohama? Only time will tell? Who will participate in this tournament? Again, only time will tell. However, should you wish to purchase tickets for this year's event, click HERE.

To see a list of which teams are currently slotted into this tournament, check out this BLOG.

Files compiled by Andrew Joseph

He's Dead Jim

Andrew (left) and Jim do a little B&E.

I thought I would share with you 'some fan mail from some flounder', to quote Bullwinkle the Moose. Actually, this e-mail was written and posted on one of my blogs about a week ago by Jim Paliouras in Melbourne, Australia.

Jim was an assistant English teacher (AET) who was on the JET (Japan Exchange & Teaching) Programme with me. While I was there in Japan (living in Ohtawara-shi, Tochigi-ken) between 1990 and 1993, Jim arrived either in July of 1991 or July of 1992. I believe it was the former.

Jim was maybe 6'-3", lanky, brown eyes and hair and had an infectious smile that I believe life has found a cure for, but hopefully he is immune to its effects. Goofy-looking in a handsome way, Jim was also very intelligent, but not so intelligent that it got in the way of him enjoying life, and was very funny. Not only could he tell a great story, he could enjoy one as well.

Andrew, I love your blogs! I've been a huge fan of, 'It's a wonderful rife' from its inception and looked forward to the Tatami Times every month. Andrew, you wrote some hilarious pieces which helped keep me sane and extremely entertained. You were one of the funniest, extraordinary and craziest people I had the pleasure of meeting in Japan. In amongst all the pretentious, phoney, cultured and elitist JETS, there was you. Real, out there and yourself. One of the funniest stories I still tell all my friends was a night you and I went nuts whilst heavily intoxicated at a conference. Lets just say, I would have loved to have seen peoples faces when they developed their photos. Thank god there was no CCTV footage of our escapades that night. Do you remember what we got up to?

Deer Jim (the spelling is correct... I don't know how to spell Jim any other way, except Gym, and I'm pretty sure that's not it, despite him being a Greek from Australia)... if you read this - and you better because I'm re-telling this tale for YOU, buddy - drop me a line at the e-mail located above or on this blog, and remind me where in Japan you lived and how long you were there for and tell me what you are up to now. And don't say 6'-3".

(Actually... I found this 2004 article featuring Jim and family! That bandit bought a house from money saved while teaching in Japan??!! I walked away with $10,000 after I managed to save that doing a lot of extra English teaching - in my final three months of my three year stay!)

I'm already pretty sure Jim was a junior high school teacher like myself, because he did organize a football (soccer) match between his junior high school kids versus a bunch of overweight, out-of-shape, over-the-hill AETs.... and I'm actually just talking about myself. It was amazing how in six short years I had lost the ability to slide tackle my opponents into submission. First off, I couldn't catch them... even though I still had that fire inside me which said 'if you are going to try and get by me, I'm going to take the ball away and take you out'. Jim had played semi-pro soccer in ... I want to say Malaysia, though Indonesia is now coming to mind. Let's say Malaysia.  

But... regardless... despite having sucked a lot of wind and sucked a lot of suckiness, that was the last time I ever played soccer. I knew when I was licked and sucked. (Why does my writing turn me on?)

Unfortunately, the same could not be said for drinking in Japan. Although a relative novice to the non-professional sport of competitive drinking, having started when I was about 23 in my first year of journalism school, I found that in three short years I had developed quite the knack for drinking, getting drunk, keeping it in me, and not being an angry obnoxious jerk. I also never got hangovers. Still haven't at the age of 46.

Perhaps because I had an internationally renowned uncle (he was a famous conductor of music back in India, and has been dead for maybe 25 years - despite the booze, like for myself, it never seemed to affect him in his day-to-day activities) who liked to hit the bottle and also never suffered fools or hangovers, I also have that ability to never, ever learn my lesson about drinking too much. Although... I do want to state that I do not drink to excess any more, and pretty much stopped that after I became engaged to a very pretty lady while in Japan.

Fortunately for you, dear reader, this adventure with Jim occurred BEFORE I became domesticated.

Jim asks... do you remember what we got up to? Yes. More or less. You can correct me with any inconsistencies you find in this epic saga. I am offended by the fact you said I wrote "some hilarious pieces". Jim, you bandit! They were all hilarious. Jim taught me the term 'bandit' back then... something that Aussies everywhere seemed to use with affection.

So... what the hell is Jim talking about? What did he and Andrew do that bears repeating by himself to his friends, and by Andrew to his friends in situations not related to this blog? It's true... I do tell this story to my friends quite often, too.

Here we go:

Once upon a time in Japan, Andrew (that's me!) left his sleepy-little city of Ohtawara, Japan to go to a renewers's conference for the JET Programme. Or maybe it was just an AET conference for teachers in the northern Tohoku area of Japan.

I'm unsure. But, trust me... I remember everything else. I think. 

For some reason I was a reasonably popular guy amongst the Japanese, and amongst the non-elitist bastard AETS. Jim is correct, there were quite a few elitist bastards on the JET Programme... people who were there to teach the English language to the Japanese. It was never like that for me. It was all about internationalization. It was to share my life with the Japanese, and they with me, so each could learn that despite our differences culturally, we are still the same social animal. I'm sure when Jim reads this, he would agree. (I hope).

In Japan - when I did drink, which was only in a social gathering, I preferred Kirin beer or hot or cold sake (rice wine). I seemed to have a lot of social gatherings, however.

Perhaps because I felt like I needed to prove to the Japanese - and to the elitist JETs that I could do anything better than they, I drank. In Japan, drinking is a socially acceptable Olympic-level sport. It's okay to come to work with a hang-over... but just don't come in smelling like a vat of booze. And don't let it affect your work.

I fit in perfectly in Japan.

Back to the story: At the reception, after picking lightly at the meals being walked around to us, someone said we should have a drinking contest. There were four of us, and so help me, I only have memory of three of the participants: One was a big American guy (the guy I can't remember visually at all); one was a smallish American dude of Japanese descent; one was myself; and the last competitor was Mister Arakawa, who was, I believe, one of the Japanese bosses of the Tochigi-ken AETs who taught at the high schools (like my ex-girlfriend-slash-sleeping partner Ashley did in Ohtawara).

Our drink du jour was sake - fermented rice wine - because when in Rome...

I am pretty sure there was no wagering involved amongst ourselves - but who knows what the observers were doing.

We had about 30 six-inch tall slender glasses that were each about 2/3's full with sake.

At the count of three, we each yelled kanpai (Cheers)! and downed our drink, turning the glass over.

We looked at each other and laughed. The first drink or two is always easy, because sake tends to taste a lot like water - until it hits you, and you become drunk very quickly.



We upturned seven more drinks... and that's when I noticed the American dude of Japanese extraction being carried away... apparently he had passed out.

The remaining three of us pointed and laughed. More drinks were ordered, and we continued. At around the 25 mark apiece, we lost the American. I never saw him leave, I never saw him fall -- and I'll be honest, I only think this guy was part of our competition because, by this time, I was wasted.

I looked over at Arakawa-san, who held up his glass and saluted me before downing it. Bugger! He was red as a lobster, and probably looked as tired as I was, but he didn't seem to be tiring.

At around the 35-drink mark, Arakawa-san and I were huffing for breath, but still standing unaided... by that I mean we stood straight ??!! and didn't lean, although I seem to recall that the walls were bent at a strange obtuse angle involving elliptic Cyclopean forms.

People... we got to our 45th drink apiece, sucked it down and grinned at each other. Arakawa-san - whose English was better than mine at this point of the evening--checked his watch and said he had to stop because he had to go to a meeting... it was 9:55 PM, so who was I to doubt him? He shook my hand, and stumbled off.

That man is my hero.

Me? I could still hang out with my girlfriend Ashley - or at least someone whom I was sleeping with whenever the mood struck as as friends-with-benefits, and I'm pretty sure that hot, sexy, little Kristine was around somewhere... so I wobbled off to the local disco in the hotel to find either of them. Would you believe it? Apparently I was so inebriated that they wouldn't let me into the disco.

I'm pretty sure I swore at a lot of people, but I decided to go look around the hotel.


That's when Jim found me. We staggered around for awhile looking at girls wishing they had the guts to come and talk to us - but perhaps the waves of alcohol being emitted by our suddenly buff bodies was acting as some sort of female repellent - I have no idea. 

Since it was obvious that none of the gaijin honeys were ever going to Oz to find some courage, Jim and I decided to follow our own yellow brick road down the path of sobriety... or whatever the word is for being inebriated.

At some point in the evening, we each had to take the mother-of-all-whizzes. Me, because of 45 shots of sake and maybe a beer... and Jim because he is Australian and born inebriated or he had joined the competition from the sidelines as an unofficial participant. I'm just guessing at that. I have no idea how Jim got drunk, or if perhaps he and I went and got more booze to drink from somewhere. That seems likely. All I know is that he was still funny and could understand me. I could understand him too - which is strange because I usually have a hard time understanding the Australian accent. Beeee-ya. Apparently that's how they pronounce the word 'beer'.

In that men's room, that was spotless despite there being an AET convention with a lot of very drunk men, Jim and I found a camera. Someone had left it there, and walked off. We began taking pictures. In those days of the early 1990s, it was all film. This one had a roll of 36 in it, with about 31 remaining.... that is until we began to point and click at everything and anything.

I am pretty sure each of us took photos of our own stream of urine hitting the blue urinal cake - which, by the way, is not an actual cake.

Then, when we had finally finished peeing some 4-and-a-half minutes later, we pitched out of the doorless men's room only to espy a large taxidermy exhibit in this quiet little area of the hotel and bumped into it. Glass! Owtch!

It was a forest scene. It was maybe 60 feet wide and 20 feet deep and had a plethora of green-leafed trees, logs, rocks, bushes, underbrush... and animals. Rabbits. Wolves. A Bear. And other furry, blurry critters I can no longer ever recall being able to focus my bleary eyes on. How the heck did we miss this place before the pee break?

There was also a large glass door in the middle of the exhibit.

We tried to open it, but it was locked.

Now here I'm a little vague, but we somehow broke the lock (not the glass). I'm guessing I did it, but it might have been Jim.

Shocked by how easy it was to open, I bade Jim to enter first. He said no way, and bade me to enter first. Like Alphonse and Gaston, we continued to politely ask the other to go first. 

Eventually, Jim called me a bandit and and entered into Eden--though neither Jim or I were naked or pretending we were Adam and Eve. We were just drunk on Japanese sake and beeee-ya with two tickets to Paradise.

I recall Jim prancing around and talking to me in his usual excited voice. Jim was touching all of the animals - and I think taking pictures of me inside the exhibit, and then giving the camera to me, I took pictures of Jim inside the exhibit. We weren't doing anything gross to the animals - I can tell you that - but we were trying to ride the deer and hug the bear. The rabbit was too fast to catch... even though it was dead. What can I say... I'm getting flashbacks of little snippets of us inside the exhibit as I type this out. 

I'm also pretty sure I fell asleep under a large tree and woke moments later in shock as a deer stood over me. Where the hell am I? And then I heard Jim continuing some conversation we had apparently been having with each other while I was asleep.  

Finally having had enough - and actually running out of film, we decided to leave our deer friends behind. You'll notice I said 'deer friends behind', rather than 'deer friend's behind', because we were happily drunk... not happily drunk perverts.

We then staggered back to the main area of the hotel lobby and found our way to the elevators, got off at our respective floors and then passed out asleep.  

According to my roomie, Matthew Hall, he got up twice during the night to smack me to make me stop snoring. While I saw Jim the next morning looking like something a bear used to wipe its behind, he was still functional, didn't seem to have a hangover and didn't smell like a distillery. He, too, fit perfectly in Japan.



I was bright and cheerful that morning (no hangover) when I saw Arakawa-san and shouted out an ohio gozaimasu (good morning)! to him. He cradled his head in his hands, whispered "itai" (pain) and begged me to be quiet.

I laughed and marched off to listen to the conference's opening address.
Somewhere wishing I knew how to break a lock, as that could be a handy and profitable skill to have,
Andrew Joseph
While today's blog title is NOT a rock and roll song, it is a famous line from Star Trek, the original series, repeated nearly every single episode by Dr. Leonard (Bones) McCoy to Capatin James (Jim) Tiberius Kirk. The title and statement, in this case, is in reference to the dead animals we played with. God, I wish I had said that to Jim while we were in that taxidermy exhibit.
PS: Jim, old buddy, old pal... I have my nearly six-year-old son Hudson in soccer, and I play by myself with a soccer ball during his practice. Both of my knees have turned slightly arthritic this past year, making any sort of shot a painful experience. But I still do it, anyways. Since I don't drink much anymore, a man's gotta have some fun some time.
PPS: And Jim... maybe you should tell me what really happened that night. Despite the length of this blog, it still seems rather vague. I wrote it down that morning during the conference... but I was probably still drunk when I did so.
PPPS: I can only hope for both our sakes, that whatever photos we took weren't in focus and thus there is no physical evidence to embarrass us... unlike our penchant for telling everybody what we did.