I'm an assistant English teacher on the JET (Japan Exchange & Teaching) Programme here in Ohtawara-shi, Tochigi-ken, Japan.
I currently do not have a girlfriend.
I have an ex-girlfriend whom I sleep with named Ashley (American). She probably wants a boyfriend but doesn't want me for a boyfriend.
I also have an ex-stalker whom I sleep with named Junko (Japanese), who has a boyfriend and doesn't want me for a boyfriend.
I also occasionally sleep with anything female in a skirt when neither is around - both Nihonjin (Japanese) or gaijin (foreigner).
All of this depresses me because I just want someone to love.
And yet... in the 16 months I have been here in Japan, aside from the woman crap, I enjoy my life here immensely.
Everyday in Japan is something new.
Unfortunately, everyday in Japan with the women in my life is not.
Ashley had spent the night last night. No... we did not have sex, though she did manage to get off... and was too tired for me. I hate that.
She woke up early - probably because she went to sleep in my very comfortable Queen-size rather than her thin futon at her place - so that she could leave at 9:30AM.
She says she wants to go home and clean her apartment. It probably needs it, but there is no way in hell I am removing myself from my warm blankies to see her off. Especially after last night's snub.
I sleep in until 11AM when I get up to answer the phone call from my good buddy Matthew. I finally get up - this time for sure - at 1:30PM when Kristine (half American and half Japanese) calls me to thank me for the Game Boy I sent her.
Now Kristine... I don't sleep with her... but we would sleep with each other if she wasn't 500 kilometers west of me in Shiga-shi, Shiga-ken. But... despite that being something we would both want, I can't see it going further. I mean... I do... but not from her. Damn, she's one fine woman.
So... I get up... I clean my apartment, do a load or two of laundry, read a book for a while and then watch some videos from back home in Toronto courtesy of my little brother Ben.
At around 8PM after eating some left-over lasagna from last night that I made for Ashley, I call her up.
I remind her that since we two are going to Nikko tomorrow that only the Ohtawara Ashikaga bank will be open, not the one in her nearby town of Nishinasuno. Hey... I plan ahead and asked around about the banking situation.
So... to save time, I ask her if she wants to come over now and spend the night.
Of course, I had just woken her up and she is far too sleepy now.
No sooner than I hang the phone up in disgust, but I hear my doorbell ring.
Regular readers will know who it is, and won't be disappointed.
Yes... it's Junko, who as soon as the front door is closed has already dropped her clothes on the floor, and is kissing me while struggling to removing my pants.
Will it be something straight, exotic or mildly dangerous today? Hopefully all three.
But how does she know when I'm alone? Stalking me again? It doesn't bother me as much as it should.
Somewhere I need a better belt,
Andrew Joseph
The photo above is me standing in front of the main entrance of my apartment complex in Ohtawara-shi, Tochigi-ken, Japan. Despite the cool beard and nice suit, my shoes are so ugly that I wish I had a pair of blue suede shoes! It was more than likely taken by Ashley. Junko had an aversion to cameras, despite her fantastic looks.
Today's blog title is by Carl Perkins because the song's lyrics fit on so many multiple levels today - and hey! If the shoe fits... wear it!:
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